“I never feel completely safe.” wrote Anita Darcel Taylor. Safety is a privilege in any given situation, one that many of us take for granted. Others never feel really safe, how would you assure your own safety anyway?
First I think of natural threats, squalls and storms, earthquakes, lightening bush fires, land slides. Then there’s spiders, snakes and sharks or lions and tigers and bears. Not to mention family and colleagues and friends, anyone who might misjudge, misunderstand, appraise or criticise.
Everyday is full of threats and dangers.
Safety is less related to taking risks than it is to perceived dangers. When bringing diverse groups together to work in discussion forums, safety is something the participants want. As the designated facilitator I feel it is important to respect and acknowledge the contribution of all perspectives. That’s my role, it can be hard for participants to feel safe speaking out in groups for all sorts of reasons.
What might be encountered from others is unknown. Individuals are at risk not knowing what might come from others. I can’t anticipate someone’s vulnerabilities and I am conscious of balancing protecting with empowering. I think that overprotecting, or over-caring, can disempower somebody else by not allowing the space for discovering their own strength or assuming they may not have some inherent resilience to draw upon.
I believe most of us can weather what comes our way but for a facilitator, especially one burdened with feeling responsible for the well-being of a group, it is a balancing act. I try to step lightly negotiating the gap between trying to build community and allowing those who want to remain quiet to withhold their experience and associated emotions, while encouraging as many as can to share. Building community requires connections. For the facilitator awareness of the process is paramount, all the while not knowing what might be said next. What I try to do is field the interactions and communicate about the exchanges bringing things into the open, making the implied explicit, that’s a way to support safety.
A particular concern in corporate environments is that having made a disclosure it can’t be rescinded. Information that is revealed will, in all probability, be remembered by others for a long time.
“A ship is safe in the harbour, but that’s not what ships are for” said William Shedd. That’s not to say one should be reckless.
Facilitating groups requires leaving the harbour. If we are to share our feelings and fears it is necessary to leave the harbour.
For me not feeling safe is a little exhilarating, I couldn’t blog if that were not true. I blog to address stigma and that requires a leaving the harbour and sailing the unknown. Like life in general, and blogging in particular, adventures I am unlikely to regret.